SUCH A THING AS TOO MANY POCKETS

When I’m preparing to go fishing, my starting point is to zip up all the pockets in my fishing bag and all the pockets in my fishing jacket, while they are still empty.
Left open, they are a temptation to over-organise –spinners on the side; spare line at the back; rag front left; knife and scissors front right; reels at rear inside; tackle box, front inside; spare pocket with press studs rolled up and put in with, er, the rag; tide table in the hidden zip pocket on the lid which will then remain forgotten again until next January; flies and lures and better have a couple of corks and an elastic band, couple of weights and swivels, in an Old Holborn tin in the net bag under the lid … and so on, until you cannot find the snippers and have to pile it all in a heap in a bucket anyway.
All fishing apparel is made with several pockets too many. There are pockets within pockets and pockets behind pockets. A serious fisherman is often dressed entirely in pockets. The flaw in this approach is that he will then also need lanyards, in order to hang on the outside of his person those bits of kit he is likely to need in a hurry.
I like the idea of lanyards. At one point, my son’s school coat was strung with a network of elastic bands which, in theory, would not keep at hand not only his gloves but a six-inch ruler, a pencil and a rude keyring from Greece, all ready to be deployed at any point, before springing back into their holsters. I understood it completely. If only we could mechanise all the usual shit, we could really get some stuff done, couldn’t we son?
But when it comes to fishing, I feel happier dressed down a little. My main fishing strategy is to try not to lose any kit that has cost more than 50p. In preparation for this, I do most of my fishing here in The Shed, trying to invent a ten-bob rig for all occasions.
If I had any idea what I was doing, I might appreciate all the pockets. As it is, I see too many pockets as a metaphysical flaw in capitalism, or something like that. There are too many pockets in all sorts of products and they cause more confusion than they solve More examples to follow. But why not send in yours?

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